My first Lithuanian dance

Rezginele, the wedding dance, performed on October 22, 1977.
(Click the photo to enlarge.)

A Brief History of Vetra

The following material was on Vaiva's hard drive, dated in 2004. The authorship is uncertain, it may have been prepared for the program book for the 2004 festival in Chicago, Vetra's final participation in a major festival. The facts are all accurate.

The Vėtra Lithuanian folk dance group was founded in New Haven, Connecticut in 1983. The initial incentive in establishing the group was the desire to participate in the 7th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Festival in Cleveland, 1984. Most of the founding members of the group were adults of Lithuanian extraction and many of them participated in other Lithuanian folk dance groups when they were children, adolescents and students. The members of the group range, in age, from 9 to 60 years. Most of the dancers reside within or near the greater New Haven area. The founding director was Ruta Mickunas but since 1987, the director and instructor has been Vaiva Vebraite Gustiene. The group’s current manager and co-instructor is Nancy Pawasauskaite.

Primarily, the group performs Lithuanian folk dances that are choreographed for adults. Occasionally, they perform some dances that would be customarily performed by youth and student groups. Relatively unique for Lithuanian folk dance ensembles in North America, the Vėtra membership does not consist solely of dancers of Lithuanian heritage. Many of the dancers are of diverse ethnic backgrounds. Anyone who is willing to learn, dance and perform Lithuanian folk dances is welcome to become a member of Vėtra.

Vėtra has performed at numerous occasions throughout Southern New England, New York and Pennsylvania. The group has participated in the 7th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Festival in Cleveland, 1984, in the 8th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Festival in Hamilton, Ontario, 1988, in the 9th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Festival in Chicago, 1992, in the 10th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Festival in Chicago, 1996 and in the 11th International Lithuanian Folk Dance Fesitval in Toronto, 2000.

In July, 1994, Vėtra proudly participated in The 1994 World Lithuanian Song and Dance Festival which was held in Vilnius, Lithuania. Just a few years ago, this would have been impossible, due to Soviet occupation.

Vėtra has performed for the Knights of Lithuania at their National Convention in New Haven, 1985 and at Ellis Island by the request of the United States Department of National Parks in 1991. We participated in numerous fund-raisers to benefit the Special Olympics World Games in New Haven, 1995. Also, Vėtra has danced at many other festivals, picnics, fairs and events of Lithuanian, American, multinational, and other ethnic heritages. In the past Vėtra has hosted an annual dinner dance that customarily featured a program of their latest repertoire and the performance of a guest dance group of different ethnic heritage. In the past few years, Vėtra has had guest ensembles such as: Bavarian Schuhplattlers, Scottish Highlanders, Estonian Folk Dancers, Swedish Folk Dancers, Ukrainian Folk Dancers, Polish Folk Dancers, and Irish Folk Dancers. In their effort to preserve the art and tradition of Lithuanian folk dance, Vėtra has achieved public recognition and popularity well beyond the local Lithuanian community.

Vėtra has sponsored and organized the local performance of several folk song and dance ensembles from Lithuania. In 1989, Vėtra presented the "Ratilio" Folklore Ensemble of Vilnius University. In 1990, Vėtra presented "Šviesa", the Folklore Ensemble of the Vilnius Pedagogical Institute.

"Vėtra", is literally defined as "sudden storm" in the Lithuanian language. It also carries overtones of surprise and exuberance.

The group conducts weekly dance rehearsals at the parish hall of St. Michael's Church, on Wooster Place in New Haven. Vėtra is currently performing its repertoire at various events around the Connecticut and Massachusetts area. In the last few months, the group has performed at the Knights of Lithuania New England District Festival at Maironis Park in Shrewsbury, Massachusetts, at Holy Trinity Church in Hartford, Connecticut, at St. George’s Lithuanian Church in Bridgeport, Connecticut and at Vėtra’s annual Vakaras in West Haven, Connecticut.

The Notebook, once again

Last January I posted some thoughts on The Notebook. Then, I had just finished listening to the book on tape.

This past week we had the DVD from the Durham Library, and I watched it again. I still like it. The director's commentary, deleted scenes and the promotional videos were also very interesting.

There was one false note, and that was the theatrical trailer for the film. Like most modern trailers, it gives away the film rather than sell the movie. Worse, they used the very distintinctive music from The Cider House Rules for the trailer, instead of the music created for The Notebook. Perhaps that music wasn't ready in time, but I hate that sort of cheat.

A portion of Rachel MacAdams' audition tape is included—she's a natural. She had the part mastered before the first take.

(13,616) Days of Vaiva

I saw (500) Days of Summer with Sirvydas last night. Although I enjoyed it, I'm not certain I can recommend it. I could not accept the fundamental premise of the film, which I won't spoil here. Also, you can't use Simon & Garfunkel's Bookends lightly, you have a high bar to get over to justify inserting that in the background music, and the film didn't clear the hurdle. The novelty of the presentation was interesting—days are plucked out of sequence from a 500-day relationship to show the highs and lows, the starts and finishes. The best lines are all in the trailer, of course.

The film title caused me to wonder how many days I had with Vaiva, and Excel tells me the answer is 13,616. That seems like a big number, yet it was much, much too short a time.

A note from Pat Illingworth

Jim,

This reminded me of Vaiva........and her love of flowers and gardens!!

“You are brighter than apples,
Sweeter than tulips,
You are the great flood of our souls
Bursting above the leaf-shapes of our hearts,
You are the smell of all Summers… ”

— Amy Lowell

Patti

Vaiva acknowledged in Lietuvos Rytas

Our friend Sigita Šimkuvienė-Rosen has a new piece in Lietuvos Rytas about Vaiva (link here). The story is in Lithuanian, but the photos that accompany it are from our June 13 memorial in Durham.

Today would have been Vaiva's 55th birthday

On the first day of this blog, I posted two photos from Vaiva's final birthday. It was my sixth post.

Here are more taken that day. Liepa made the cake, decorating it with raspberries from our garden.

Tblisi

This is totally out of order, but I have it at hand.

One of the special talents that Vaiva brought to her service for the Lithuanian government was her poise in public appearances and her superb English language skills. Accordingly, Vaiva was frequently sent to international education conferences. In 2003, she was asked to make a presentation in Tblisi, Georgia. I was filled with apprehension at this trip, because that part of the world is not safe. But she went, she succeeded. Below is a movie of the PowerPoint she employed to supplement her talk. I have her speech as well, but as Liepa observed, it is not "blog-friendly" (too long). As you will see, it is also a comprehensive summary of Vaiva's own work for Lithuanian education reform.

If the slides go by faster than you can read, you can pause it.

A riot of flowers

The vine

I don't know what kind of vine this is, and I'm concerned that it might damage the siding. But Vaiva stopped me from cutting it back, because she believe that the blossoms, which began to appear a couple weeks ago, attract hummingbirds. Although I have seen hummingbirds in years past, I haven't seen any this year.

Vaiva's flowers in August

Vaiva's plan for the garden gives us new blooms all summer long.

Vover is looking out the window.

My grandmother has died

My maternal grandmother died yesterday. Agnes Ellen Meath Marko Franklin was 98 years old. She lived on the farm where my mother was raised until she was 94. A lifelong heavy smoker, somehow she dodged the cancer bullet, while Vaiva, who did nothing to raise her cancer risk, died at 54. Grandma Franklin most likely died from complications of a stroke, but fundamentally died from old age.

The portrait above was extracted from the wedding photo of my family, below. By that time, Grandma Franklin had buried two husbands.

The boys

Lokys and Sirvydas, at the castle.

The castle

This is the castle behind the cemetery,built by Fr. Yla.

The stained glass windows, seen from inside the castle. It was too dark to get an interior shot, I didn't have a flash.

The grounds outside the castle.

Eight months

Vaiva died eight months ago today.

Putnam dancers

The campers provided the customary afternoon entertainment.

On the convent grounds, during the picnic

Striking how much the place feels like an outdoor cathedral.

AAII Journal

The August issue of AAII Journal arrived today, the magazine of the American Association of Individual Investors. Cover story: Smart Steps for Coping With Widowhood.

Hammer, may I introduce you to Nail?

Putnam graves

Gravestones exhibit an uncommon diversity of styles and messages in Putnam. The graves are well tended, many with living flowers. The mood is very like the cemeteries in Lithuania.

Last Putnam picnic--outdoor Mass

After a delay, I finally have access to the photos I took in Putnam at the final Lithuanian picnic in July. The program began with an outdoor Mass, which was well attended.

Father Arvydas Zygas celebrated the Mass.

He had help.

Exit at the conclusion.

Long waves

One of the greatest things about Vaiva's life is how she affected so many people, some directly and many more indirectly, in the many roles that she inhabited. Many of the people that she worked with in Lithuanian education will be influential for another generation.

Sometimes the touch may be less formal, yet no less important. I thought about that after I read this remarkable tribute to John Hughes, who died earlier this week at age 59.

My life with Vaiva

Gita Kupčinskas has sent the following lovely remembrance of growing up with Vaiva. Gita's funeral tribute is here, a photo of her at the funeral is here.

I met Vaiva Vėbraitė when she was three years old and I was six. I remember the day well because someone took beautiful photos of Vaiva, my sister Diana, our mothers, and me in the Vėbra family garden during our visit. Periodically, I come across those photos. Vaiva really, really didn‘t want to have her picture taken that day. Diana and I loved posing. Thus began a life-long friendship, though I am not so sure that I should term it friendship. It was really more of a kinship. We were a bit like sisters who just didn‘t live in the same house.

Because Vaiva was being raised by five adults (her mother, father, maternal grandmother, maternal grandfather, and Teta Lijolė—her aunt), she had many advantages. Vaiva had adult conversations about a variety of topics from a very early age. She learned to read early and read avidly, both in Lithuanian and in English. She was exposed to the worlds of music, art, literature, and history long before many of her peers. I think her imagination was greatly enhanced by the attention of these five loving people. But life among these fascinating adults had its disadvantages as well. Vaiva didn‘t really know how to play. She didn‘t relate easily to other children. That‘s where I came in.

Being three years her senior, I probably matched Vaiva‘s intellect, at least for a while. Vaiva didn‘t particularly like games with standard toys, but she really responded to my suggestions to act out the Nancy Drew mystery series. The many rooms and passage ways of the Victorian style house and garden on Lawrence Street—the Vėbra home—made a terrific background for these adventures. The backyard garden was not really what I would call cultivated. It seemed to grow at will. But it was filled with surprising and delightful pleasures such as wayward raspberry bushes.

The house itself had two main floors with many rooms. Some of them were supposed to be off limits to us children because they housed the paintings which Teta Lijole was working on, but once the adults got involved with their coffee and tea, we were pretty much on our own to explore at will. When I look back on it, I don‘t think there was much order or discipline in the Vėbra home, but there sure was a lot of imagination and a great deal of love.

Once,Vaiva and her father brought home an injured baby squirrel, which they had found in the park. I remember going over for a visit and spending the better part of the day holding the cute little animal in my lap. I couldn‘t wait to go to Vaiva‘s again so that I could hold and pet the squirrel. However, the next time I was there, the squirrel had recovered from its injuries and had grown substantially. When I tried to hold it, I got scratched—not exactly the greeting I had been expecting. The untamed little creature literally spent most of the time racing around the walls of the room along the ceiling, jumping from one piece of furniture to the next. That‘s what it was like visiting Vaiva; you never knew what to expect next.

As children Vaiva and I shared a great number of things. Because my mother was a good seamstress, Vaiva often got to wear the clothes I had outgrown. In fact, she received her First Communion wearing the dress my mother had made for me when I received the sacrament. In Lithuanian school we had the same teachers. We were part of the same Lithuanian dancing groups and youth organizations. During the summers we were at the same camps. When we went off to college, Vaiva and I never particularly kept up with each other. We didn‘t phone; we didn‘t write letters. But whenever we got together, things were always the same. We could talk to each other honestly, and we could share the secret corners of our lives. That never changed.

When Vaiva became close to Jim, she went through a great deal of soul searching. She had grown up quintessentially Lithuanian. How was this—albeit intelligent and handsome—mid-western American going to fit into the life Vaiva had envisioned for herself? She knew one thing deep in her heart, however. No one would ever love her the way Jim did, so she chose to make him the partner of her life. From that point on, I would say that Vaiva blossomed. Those of us who had known her as the shy, unusual, sometimes awkward little girl, saw the emergence of a confident, graceful, beautiful woman. It was delightful to watch, and quite the talk among the ladies of St. Casimir‘s parish after Sunday Mass.

Even when Vaiva and I were adults, our lives continued to intertwine. When the twins were born, Aidas and I were moved that Vaiva and Jim chose us to be the the godparents of Lokys. It brought our families closer together—relatives by choice as the Lithuanians say. For many years, the members of Sodauto (the folk ensemble which I led in the Boston area) together with the members of Vėtra (the dancing group which Vaiva led in the Hartford area) got together at the Vėbra-Gust homestead to celebrate Joninės—St. John‘s night, the Lithuanian summer solstice. What magical nights those were with bonfires, wreaths of flowers, singing, dancing, blossoming ferns, and of course raganos and laumės, witches and wood nymphs.

Then there were the A.P.P.L.E. years. From the very beginning Vaiva called me to be part of the planning sessions. Those early years were filled with difficult yet immensely gratifying experiences. When I took on administrative roles at the school where I work, it became harder for me to be part of every seminar since I work during the summer. But in 2001 I did take my turn at being president because the work was too important to let die. Later, when Vaiva battled back cancer and agreed to be president of A.P.P.L.E. for a second time, she asked me to be program coordinator at Klaipėda during the summer of 2005. I didn‘t refuse. It was Vaiva asking. How could I refuse?

As you do with younger siblings while you are growing up, I think I sometimes took Vaiva for granted. She was just always there as part of my life. We didn‘t keep in constant contact, yet we knew that we could call on each other whenever we needed each other. Even when Vaiva became an important figure on the Lithuanian national and international scene, I think she liked to spend time with me because there were no roles to play; we could be ordinary together. Thinking now that Vaiva is no longer with us doesn‘t really make sense to me. I have to believe that Vaiva is with us in a new way. We will continue to feel her presence in our midst over and over again. Vaiva always was and always will be part of my life.