When I was invited to lead you in song for this gathering to commemorate one year since Vaiva‘s death, I found it to be a very easy undertaking. Remembering Vaiva in song is quite natural for me, not because Vaiva herself was a great singer, but because she loved Lithuanian songs. Certainly, songs were a big part of the experiences I shared with Vaiva. I knew right away which songs I wanted to sing with you today.
The earliest songs Vaiva and I shared were learned when we were little girls attending Camp Immaculata, run by the sisters in Putnam, CT. We were part of that lucky generation who learned their songs from the older campers as we sat around a bonfire late into the evening. Many of those songs expressed a longing for Lithuania; many of them were based on remembrances. The irony was that neither Vaiva nor I had ever seen Lithuania ourselves, but the songs made us feel as if we had. „O atsimenu namelį“ captures this longing for the homestead where mother sang lullabies that urged the child to grow up to serve God and country. I am sure Vaiva felt that call in her life.
Some of the songs we sang at camp were associated with the Lithuanians who had been exiled to Siberia. „Leiskit į tėvynę“ captures that longing to return to Lithuania, again a place we had never been.
Whenever we had an event at St. Casimir‘s church in New Haven, whenever the Lithuanian community gathered in the hall for a dinner or a commemoration, eventually a song would break out spontaneously, and the singing would begin. A favorite among the men was the beautiful „Kaip aras pašautas.“ Most of us just called it „Aras.“ What a feeling that was to stand beside the group of men with their powerful voices and to listen to the sad and haunting words of this song. I wonder if it was this song that inspired Vaiva and Jim to name their first child Aras.
Later, songs became very much a part of our A.P.P.L.E. experience. With Jim‘s suggestion for the inspired name, A.P.P.L.E., we were able to do so much with the symbolism of the apple as the gift to the teacher. So we brought our gifts to the teachers of Lithuania. A song which became somewhat of an anthem for our organization was „Šių naktelį, per naktelį,“ a song that had become popular during the large demonstrations which marked the Lithunian independence movement. It speaks of planting apple trees, a symbol of our hopes for the work we were doing in Lithuania.
How often the opening ceremonies and the closing ceremonies of our A.P.P.L.E. seminars would end up in singing. The whole audience would stand up, throw thier arms around each other, and start singing and swaying together. Very often the song which inspired this show of emotion was the simple little melody „Žemė Lietuvos.“
This would have been a great conclusion for our sing-along today, but I have to share another moment of song. Vaiva was the leader of the Lithuanian folk dance group Vėtra. I directed the Lithuanian folk ensemble Sodauto. I have wonderful memories of the many years that we celebrated Joninės, St. John‘s Eve, at the Vėbra-Gust homestead together. Those were also nights by the bonfire, filled with singing, dancing, and magic. Eventually, we would get around to singing one of my group‘s favorite melodies „Oi, aisiu, aisiu.“ This was a song of longing and farewell that expressed the young bride‘s wish to go back home. We often sing it as a last farewell.
Finally, I come full circle to those early bonfires, those summer nights of our youth. „Ramios, malonios vasaros naktys“ is a song which captures the passion of a young heart. Truly, Vaiva lived her life passionately. She gave herself wholeheartedly to all that was important to her. The words of this song express the desire to embrace the world, to love God, and to reach eternal beauty. This is my wish for Vaiva today, that she has reached eternal beauty.
Vaiva prisimenant . . .
O atsimenu namelį, tą gimtinį savo,
Kur motulė prie lopšelio supdama liūliavo.
Ir dainelė ta lopšinė, ta daina motulės
Ir šiandieną man ausyse skamba čiūčia liūlia.
Čiūčia liūlia, mažutėli, auk greičiau, užauki,
Ir Dievulis ir tėvynė tavęs jauno laukia.
Kai išklystu į pasaulį platų, begalinį,
Tėviškėlės atminimas man laimužę mini.
Kai į saulę pasižiūriu, vakaro saulužę,
Man ji primena, kaip gyvą, mylimą mamužę.
Ir kasdien regiu tą kaimą, tą namelį savo,
Kur gyvenimo palaima man lopšy liūliavo.
Leiskit į tėvynę, leiskit pas savus,
Ten pradžiugs krūtinė, atgaivins jausmus.
Pirm negu aušrelė skaisti užtekės,
Ten mano dainelė linksmai suskambės.
Čia jausmai man žuvo, kaliny širdis,
Leiskit į Lietuvą, akys ten nušvis . . .
Svetima padangė, nemaloni, ne.
Tėviškėlę brangią vis regiu sapne.
Kaip aras, pašautas ir blaškomas vėjo,
Toli nuo tėvynės randuos.
Tik vieną maldauju: O Viešpatie geras,
Leisk numirt bent tėvynės krantuos.
Kaip būdavo gera po liepom šakotom
Nuvargusią galvą priglaust.
Ir rytą auksinį rasotom palankėm
Nubrist ligi pačio dangaus.
Upeliai tekėjo, miškeliai šlamėjo
Kur aš mažutėlis gimiau.
Tie patys upeliai, miškai, uogienojai,
Tik mes—nebe tie, nebe tie . . .
Šių naktelį, per naktelį nemigau, nemigau.
Su brolaliu obelėlį sadinau, sadinau.
Prigyk, prigyk, obelėla, valyvai, valyvai.
Nokink savo obuolėlius raudonai, raudonai.
Aš priskinsiu obuolėlių raudonų, raudonų,
Ir nunešiu mergužėlei dovanų, dovanų.
Mergužėle, lelijėle, kur buvai, kur buvai,
Kad šių naktį jaunimėly nebuvai, nebuvai?
Šių naktelį, per naktelį nemigau, nemigau.
Su brolaliu obelėlį sadinau, sadinau.
Tu tokia brangi, žemė mūs gimta.
Tau mintis šviesi, tau širdy vieta.
Žemėj Lietuvos ąžuolai žaliuos.
Ąžuolai žaliuos žemėj Lietuvos.
Tu tokia maža ir tokia didi,
Nemuno vaga Lietuvos širdy.
Žemė Lietuvos . . .
Ar diena dienos, ar naktelė tems,
Duok mums šilumos, duonos ir vandens.
Žemė Lietuvos . . .
Oi aisiu, aisiu aš čia nebūsiu,
Brisiu per upį, per Dunojėlį.
Per Dunojėlį laiveliu plauksiu,
Per žalių girių paukšteliu skrisiu.
Oi aisiu, aisiu aš čia nebūsiu,
Brisiu per upį, per žalių girių.
Ramios, malonios vasaros naktys;
Medžio užmigęs nejuda lapas.
Viskas nutilo, viskas nurimo,
Vienos tik žvaigždės mirkčioja, dega.
Viskas užmigo, viskas nurimo;
Žemę apsupo meilės svajonės.
Neša jos sielą, neša, liūliuoja,
Ilgesio pilnos ir įkvėpimo.
Noris apimti visą pasaulį;
Noris mylėti Dievą aukščiausią.
Noris pasiekti amžiną grožį . . .
Ko gi taip liūdna? Ko gi taip ilgu?
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